MESSAGE TO ABANDONED FACEBOOK FRIENDS

Dear (Insert Name of Rejected Individual Here):

I regret to inform you that, after careful consideration, I have decided to eliminate you from my Facebook friends list. Please know that this is in no way a reflection of your value as an individual, as I'm sure you are beloved (or at least tolerated) by your friends and family. It’s just that either...


1) You have fallen out of my favor or 
2) I don’t remember who the hell you are.

I sincerely wish you good fortune in all your future endeavors. Incidentally, if any of them happen to come to fruition and you are thus in a position to further my own agenda, please do not delay in accepting the friend request I shall be sending your way.


Sincerely,
(Insert Your Name Here)